I Dream of Lee-Li

You know how in some movies they have a dream sequence, only they don't tell you it's a dream? This is so not a dream.

Okay, so my life isn't as much of a movie as I'd like to think it is, but I sure like to live in my own delusional dream world. Ellen and I should have our own TV-reality show; she's the Paris Hilton to my Nicole Richie-- or is it the other way around?

Lately, I've been having the most vivid, realistic dreams. (Get your head out of the gutter Terry) I'm sure everyone's had the occasional weird dream, or two. The kind of dream where The Grimace steals all your corn, but I'm not talking about these weird, acid-trip dreams. For the last three weeks I've been having reoccurring dreams of the guy I kind of like at the moment. Now, this might seem like normal behavior to everyone, but I've had crushes before and I've never dreamed of them. Am I finally starting to tap into some unknown precognitive power? I'd like to think I am, and not just because of my earlier stated delusions, but because lately my other dreams have come true. Even Ellen can vouch for the newly awakened Miss Cleo in me. Call 1-800-Miss-Lee for your free psychic reading now, man.

"A dream is a wish your heart makes, when you're fast asleep." At least this is what the experts at Walt Disney have to say on the subject of dreams and wishes. I personally like to keep my wishing down to falling stars, wishing wells, and the occasional naked genie. In fact, the other night while driving home I was blessed with seeing the most beautiful falling star. Of course, I didn't waste any time closing my eyes, and clasping my hands together to make a certain wish. (Yes, I was still driving) I'd love to tell you my wish, but then it won't come true!

It's like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed. The castle, well, it may not be a castle. And it's not so important happy ever after, just that it's happy right now. See once in a while, once in a blue moon, people will surprise you, and once in a while people may even take your breath away.

Now, it is your turn to make a wish; I shall be your magical genie-- minus the Barbara Eden outfit. All you have to do is rub and click the magical comment button and make any three wishes of your choosing. Remember, you only get three wishes, and what you wish for is what you get. (Please read the fine-print to said wishes)

Make a wish!

Posted :: Sunday, April 9, 2006 @ 08:54 p.m. ::

Where the Hell Is My Chiffon?

In order to stop disappointing Ellen I need to update my crappy corner of cyberspace. My only purpose in life is to entertain Ellen.

Happy belated VD everyone! I hope everyone ended up shagging, or at least ended up with a hot snog session, or two. As far as VD, don't end up with Chlamydia. I know what you're all saying, "Oh Lee, you're so witty. How do you do it?"

There was a stomach-clenching episode of Project Runway on tonight. I trust you all watched because it's one of the best shows on TV--And if you don't watch it Cara will cut off your peepee with her shears. I was a little nervous while watching tonight, but my three favorite designers have made it to Fashion Week.

Who do you think is either IN or OUT?

1. Santino Rice
2. Chloe Dao
3. Daniel Vosovic

While we're on the topic of Project Runway (Lighten up Lee, it's JUST fashion) Santino Rice has a fantastic blog that I frequent religiously like one of his little posse-whores (or pores for short) Check it out: http://santinorice.com/

I left Santino a comment the other day, and I'm quite proud of my raunchy reporte:

To my dearest Santino,

I love you! You are the shit eternal.

I just have one question: If I traded in my vagina for a penis would you marry me?

Santino for PRESIDENTE!

Sieg Heil Santino!

Posted by The Lee | 8:41 PM

I'd like to take the time to backtrack to the comments about VD. How did everyone celebrate? Did anyone in real life get their fairy tale Valentines? I demand dirty details!

Before I leave you all to write about your delicious valentines, I'd like to congratulate myself on a perfect math test this week. 100% Go Lee! Student + Tutor = Success!

Ja!

Posted :: Thursday, February 16, 2006 @ 02:35 a.m. ::

Two and One

Enjoy one of my theme songs...
Jenny Lewis - You Are What You Love (Exobud)

This is no great illusion
When I'm with you I'm looking for a ghost
Or invisible reasons
To fall out of love and run screaming from our home
Because we live in a house of mirrors
We see our fears and everything
Our songs, faces, and secondhand clothes
But more and more we're suffering
Not nobody, not a thousand beers
Will keep us from feeling so all alone

But you are what you love
And not what loves you back
That's why I'm here on your doorstep
Pleading for you to take me back

The phone is a fine invention
It allows me to talk endlessly to you
About nothing, disguising my intentions
Which I'm afraid, my friend, are wildly untrue
It's a sleight of hand, a white soul band
The heart attacks I'm convinced I have
Every morning upon waking
To you I'm a symbol or a monument
Your rite of passage to fulfillment
But I'm not yours for the taking

But you are what you love
And not what loves you back
I guess that's why you keep calling me back

I'm fraudulent, a thief at best
A coward who paints a bullshit canvas
Things that will never happen to me
But at arms length, it's Tim who said
I'm good at it, I've mastered it
Avoiding, avoiding everything

But you are what you love, Tim
And not what loves you back
And I'm in love with illusions
So saw me in half
I'm in love with tricks
So pull another rabbit out of your hat

I guess today is the perfect day to update my journal--A very-very-very perfect day.

Cheers!

Posted :: Sunday, January 22, 2006 @ 02:19 a.m. ::

New Year's Eve, I'm in Glendora

New Year = New Entry

Seriously, I promise to start making frequent updates.

Anybody make any resolutions this year? What were they?

My Resolutions:

1. Frequent entries
2.Procrastinate on resolutions

That's all I have so far...

Posted :: Sunday, January 1, 2006 @ 03:16 a.m. ::

Sex Can Wait Masturbate!

And who doesn't love puppies?

Posted :: Friday, November 25, 2005 @ 09:29 p.m. ::

Enter Stage Right

Okay, I'm sorry! I just haven't felt like adding an entry since my last one. Well, I have, but I didn't feel like using the required energy to type it. That's why I'm making this one short and sweet.

A lot has happened, so much that I couldn't even give you a detailed account of everything. It's November (But you already knew that) and It's getting cold (Duh) and I'm getting cold. (Always been a cold hearted bitch) and that's about the best recap I have for you.

The reason I chose to inform you on my recent happening is because last night, possibly the best night of my life, I, Lee Meredith, yours truley, held a boys hand. Wow. Big deal, eh? Infact, it was a big deal because never in my life have I been pushy enough to go (balls deep) and grab a guys hand. And I didn't feel bad about being forward for once, later on at night I didn't hit myself over and over again. The best part is, that when our hands connected it felt right. It just felt like my hand had always been there, and I had no worries--only sweet bliss!

I'll give you guys more fan service later, but for now I need to study! (benkyou)

Ja! Ciao!

Posted :: Tuesday, November 8, 2005 @ 09:24 a.m. ::

spousal abuse

Ha ha ha.

I updated, Ellen! So as a crazy friend would say, "Eat it! Eat it RAW!"

Spousal abuse is so hot.

Do you love it?

What the fuck am I talking about?

Booyah Ellen! I updated!

Posted :: Sunday, July 10, 2005 @ 09:11 a.m. ::

Gimme Your Hot, White...

Ellen: Someday Lee, you are going to have to brave the world of the blowjob

Liz Phair - H.W.C. (on the Exobud)

Give it to me, don't give it away
Don't think about what the others say
My skin's getting clear, my hair's so bright
All you do it fuck me every day and night
You're my secret beauty routine
Na na na na, what my body has seen
I am looking good and I'm feeling nice
Baby you're the best magazine advice

Give me your hot white cum
Give me your hot white cum
Give me your hot white cum
I'm gonna throw you back down between the sheets
Everything is fresher when the day is sweet
In the morning light when you're already on the phone
Face it one of these days
Without you i'm just another dorian gray
It's the fountain of youth, it's the meaning of life
So hot, so sweet, so whet my appetite

Give me your hot white cum
Give me your hot white cum
Give me your hot white cum

Face it one of these days
Without you i'm just another dorian gray
It's the fountain of youth, it's the meaning of life
Baby you're the best magazine advice

Give me your hot white cum
Give me your hot white cum
Give me your hot white cum

Thanks for the comments:
Brett- It's alright, we can always play ball

Lou- You're way too sweet to me! Why don't you love me?

Kittens- I wasn't high, it's just my sex appeal.

Azy- As always, thanks for listening. Oh, and glad to see you back and alive!

John- I want your hot white...

Terry- Ellen loves all the help you did, but I still need to finish it before she kills me.

Abby- Abby + Lee x spandex = orgasm

Steff- I'm always lusty, but you're right...I need to get laid.

Ellen- I only cum when I'm on top. (personal joke)

That's all you bitches get for now.

Posted :: Wednesday, June 8, 2005 @ 09:52 AM. ::